Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or the press, or the right of the people to peaceably assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
A well-regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Swedish Chef ROX!

Okay, this post isn't really about anything, it's just an excuse for me to watch some Swedish Chef.

The Swedish Chef has an uncle?! Who knew?

No, Piggy, not that kind of hot dog!

After this, you'll swear off Turtle Soup too!

Chef give Kobe Bryant a run for his money-and his chicken!

Food Fights Back!

That's all for now. ENJOY!

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

SHEESH! Ya Happy Now?

Yeesh. There is just no pleasing some people. I put the template back the way it was before. Happy now?

Doesn't look like I'll get to work on The Few and The Proud today, either. Some more unexpected errands have popped up and it looks like I'll be out of the house for most of the day. Sorry.

Also, I'm reconsidering my decision to remove More Than a Job and Codename: White Knight from the blog.

Monday, March 26, 2007

The Esperimentations Continue

As you've no doubt noticed, I changed the blog's color scheme again because some people kept complaining about how it made their eyes bleed.

*mutters obscenities under his breath*

In the words of Bill Cosby is his famous dentist routine: "Ah hobe dat yu awe sthatithfide!"

Okay, onwards and upwards!!!

I have not yet begun writing Star Wars: The Few and The Proud, but I WILL VERY SOON!!! I had planned on starting it today, but my interview for an intership (which I think went very well) and a minor crisis with a college application (someone, I'm not sure who, lost my high school transcript, messing up my application) have put that on hold. Look for the first chapter, or at least the introduction, tomorrow.

I now leave you with the immortal word of Phillip K. Dick:

Sometimes the only appropriate response to reality is to go insane.

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Something's Different...

Having grown bored with my blog's original color scheme, I decided to mess around with it a little bit (no duh).

Now that I'm finished, I realize that the color scheme reminds me somehow of blue jeans. I like blue jeans; I almost always wear them all of the time.

I hope that last sentence made sense to you, because having written it, I'm now kinda confused.

I'm gonna start writing Star Wars: The Few and The Proud soon. Two sort-of major changes:

  1. The story starts off with rising tensions between China and Taiwan, not Iran and Iraq
  2. The pilot the Marines get sent in to rescue is a fellow Marine rather than Air Force (the Marines have their own F/A-18 Hornet and AV-8B Harrier squadrons).

That's all for now.

Wait, no it isn't. I have an interview for an internship tomorrow. Wish me luck!

UPDATE: I've played around with the coloring some more in an effort to make the new layout more eye-friendly. Let me know if this is better.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Another Fallen Author

I must admit, the response to my last post was somewhat underwhelming.

Joepoe, if I've told you once, I've told you a hundred times; YOU NEED TO START YOUR OWN BLOG!!! *pant* *pant* *pant*

Okay, now that that's out of my system...

I'm sorry Ali, but you and Kevin (whoever he is) have lost yet another author to the Dark Side aka Fan Fiction.

The basic premise of my proposed story, tentatively titled Star Wars: The Few and The Proud, is as follows: Following an escalation of tensions between Iran and Iraq, an American F-15 Eagle fighter jet is shot down near the Iran/Iraq border by an Iranian anti-aircraft missile. A Marine Force Recon team is sent in to rescue the downed pilot, but in the midst of the operation, the Marines and the pilot are suddenly transported to the Star Wars universe. More specifically, they wind up on Naboo just before the Trade Federation invades (i.e. just before Episode I begins). I've got the story pretty much figured out until a year or so after Ep. I ends, but I plan on taking it through the end of the prequels and possible into Original Trilogy territory.

As stated in my last post, this story concept has already been tried somewhat successfully (the sequels to Enter the Stalkers dissolved into a mass-crossover that seemed to spiral out of control), I want to take my own shot at the idea. Because quite frankly, it intrigues me. A lot.

Well, dinner's up. Gotta run!

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Late Night, Quick Post, Big News

Okay, first off, yes, I do realise I'm posting this at 11:00 PM. Before you ask, no, I don't have anything better to do.

And now that that's all taken care of...

Firstly, I have another installment of The Hitman Chronicles in the works. I have not begun writing it yet because I still need to iron out one major detail (will he fight the cops or more cons?) but once I get that worked out it'll be up real fast.

Secondly, I have another story in the works. It's an idea I came up with a while back and actually started writing, though sadly it was lost when my hard drive conked out. However, two separate stories I discovered on FanFiction.Net, Wolves on the Border and Enter the Stalkers, both written by The Merry Prankster, reminded me of my original plot. The premise of my story is that a group of US Marines are somehow transported into the Star Wars universe right before The Phantom Menace begins. If my memory serves me correctly, I planned to take the story all through the prequels and (possibly) into the original trilogy.

Okay, I know you're asking yourselves why you should care. Simple: because I'm going to post this story on the blog.

Wait... didn't he decide not to do that anymore?

Yeah, I did. But honestly, I really don't care if anyone steals this idea because, as I previously stated, it's already been done before and I'll (hopefully) still devote most of my efforts to finishing Codename: White Knight. Plus, seeing as how Star Wars is owned by George Lucas, no one can attempt to make any money off of it. Well, not without getting sued, anyways.

Okay, now it's like 11:20 and I'm beat. I'm too tired to look for a lightsaber pic tonight. Sorry.

Hmm... so much for this being a quick post...

Bye y'all.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Another Day, Another Hit.

As I promised earlier, The Hitman Chronicles has been updated. This latest post is entitled Judge & Executioner. It's something of a departure from the previous two chronicles in that it focuses more on suspense than action. But (IMHO) it's still very good. Give it a read and tell me what you think.

Also, I forgot to mention this last time, but another reason I pulled down More Than a Job and Codename: Whike Knight is because it looked to me like no one was reading them and they were just taking up cyber-space. However, even if I get a bunch of people commenting in saying that they were reading them, I will not repost. They are down for good. Sorry.

It's time for another lightsaber pic, courtesy of Random Sabers:

Friday, March 16, 2007

So Long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, Goodbye!

I have made the difficult decision to pull both More Than a Job and Codename: White Knight offline. I have come to realize posting them on the blog had a negative impact on my creativity: I deliberately shortened/cut out multiple ideas in order to keep each post at a reasonable length. Also, and this is probably just me being paranoid, I was afraid someone might steal my ideas, pass them off as their own, and then make a great deal of money off of them.

The Hitman Chronicles will remain online, however, and will be updated on a semi-regular basis. In the meantime, I will continue writing White Knight and will clean up and add to MTaJ. If all goes to plan, you might find them in hardback one day...

And now, your daily randomsaber picture:

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Stupidity and Sad News

Remember a ways back (early December) when my computer completely died and I said that I lost all of my files? Turns out that's incorrect, but only partly so.
The CDs I mention in this post were some of the ones I used to back up my PC's hard drive, so some of the files were recovered. Unfortunately, because of my stupidity and arrogance in assuming that I'd soon be getting a new computer (my PC was five years old when I inherited it), I only backed up the hard drive once. In June of 2005. Talk about stupid.

So Legacy of the Swan, Ghosts of Sherwood, all the stories that I'd partially written and planned on posting on my blog, and even a few others, well, they're all gone now. In all honesty, they'll probably never get posted. Fortunately, I'm now writing Codename: White Knight directly into the blog, so that won't be affected, nor will its planned (currently untitled) sequel.

However, there may yet be some hope. I was planning on gutting Legacy and starting again from scratch, along with a major, but less intense, revision of Ghosts. So we'll just have to see...

As is my custom, I'm going to leave you with a pic of another Random Saber hilt. This one's called Akula, which is Russian for 'shark.' Fitting, no?

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Still Alive?

Okay, I understand that not everyone has enough free time to check blogs each and every day, and I understand that it's only been 2 days since I last posted, but I still have to ask...


Sweeney Todd is over! But still, no one seems to check my blog (besides Joepoe. Kudos, buddy.) What the heck is goin' on?!

*pant* *pant* *pant*

Okay, now that I've gotten that out of my system...

Just got Need For Speed: Carbon for the Wii. So far, I like it a lot. My current car in Career Mode is a modified 2004 Lotus Elise, but I'm planning on buying a 1969 Dodge Charger R/T (Dukes of Hazard, anyone?) as soon as I get the cash. Why, you ask? Because the Charger, in its stock form, performs the same as my heavily upgraded Elise.

Gotta go, but not before I leave you with another awesome lightsaber:

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Just In Case You Missed It...

Chapter 3 of Codename: White Knight is up and running. Please read and review. I've overcome my case of writer's block, so Chapter 4 will be up by next weekend.

Also, be sure to check out this post from about a week ago. Or, if you're too lazy to read it (BTW, I don't blame you if you are, it's a really long post), just check you this website;

I've noticed that the amount of attention blog posts recieve appears to be inversely proportional to their lenght, so I'm going to shut up now. But not before leaving you with this awesome picture:

PS. Whoever wrote the comment on my last post that (s)he asked/forced me to delete, please repost it, only without the curse word. I actually really liked it. And Tuco's (The Ugly's) line was actually; "If you have to shoot, shoot, don't talk." Great scene, great movie.

Thursday, March 8, 2007

Unforseen Complications

Chapter 3 is up at last. I sincerely apologize for taking so long write it. I guarantee that Chapter 4 will be finished and posted by next Friday.

I must admit that I'm very underwhelmed by the response, or rather lack thereof, to my previous post. I figured that a place that machines custom lightsaber hilts would generate at least a little buzz. And I can't even blame Sweeney Todd for it anymore!

Several dilemmas have arisen for our proposed Star Wars/Doctor Who FanFilm, tentatively titled Doctor Who versus The Sith Lord. While we have a completed script, it still needs to be cleaned up a bit, mainly in making the Doctor's lines sound more, for lack of a better word, Doctor-ish. Fortunately, nerdjedi's got someone who can take care of that. We are also in need of some actors; I will be playing the role of the Sith (I already have some costume ideas), but we still need a Jedi Knight and a Doctor. nerdjedi has someone in mind for the roll of The Doctor, but that still leaves us down one Jedi.

A bigger problem is the lack of props; while we could order a pair of relatively inexpensive ($50-$75 each) lightsaber hilts from Random Sabers (see below for info), they have a waiting list for props that is about three months long. We are also in need of a TARDIS, and while I have found accurate plans for one on the web, nerdjedi doesn't believe we can build one and make it look good. However, seeing as the only full-scale replica that I've been able to locate costs upwards of $5,000, it doesn't look like he has much of a choice. But either way, we still need the wood, a lot of blue paint, and at least one person with serious woodshop skills.

However, our largest problem is the lack of a special effects technician (NOTE: SEE UPDATE BELOW). While nerdjedi is quite capable of creating the lightsaber blades (just look at his blog for proof), he does not want to, and I quote, "spend a year rotoscoping a million frames worth of lightsaber blades." I've tried to convince him that a) there won't be a million frames, and b) even if there were, it still wouldn't take a year. I've calculated that , based on an estimated run time of six minutes and shooting at 30 frames per second, there will be just over 10,000 frames total , approximately 2/3 of which will feature a lightsaber, so only about 6600 frames, which, figuring an average of 300 frames rotoscoped per day (I plan on helping) equates out to just over three weeks worth of video editing. So I really don't see what nerdjedi's complaining about (It took Ryan Wieber and Michael Scott about 4 months to rotoscope the original Ryan vs. Dorkman, and there's a lot more saber action in that one).

Okay, so maybe I'm taking this project seriously and no one else is. But this is the closest I've ever come to actually making a movie. So needless to say, I really want this to work.


nerdjedi just informed me that he is not unwilling to undertake several weeks/months of rotoscoping, but is rather unable; we don't have Adobe After Effects, and even if we did download it, we don't have the program necessary for it to work (Adobe Premier). And we can't download it, it costs $200+. And nerdjedi has also informed me that my estimates for how long it would take to rotoscope were extremely inaccurate: the movie will be far longer than 6 minutes, and with our current resources, there is no way any single person can rotoscope 300 frames per day (It'll take approximately 50 hours per 300). We think we might just rewrite the script and replace the Jedi and Sith with a ninja and a pirate (or something like that)...

I would like to apologize to nerdjedi for the statements I made earlier in this post. I made wildly outrageous assumptions, both about his abilities and his attitude. For that, I am deeply sorry.

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

Holy Crap! I Want One Of Those!

No Chapter 3 today (not that anyone seems to care). Moving on...

You are not going to believe what I found while surfing the web last night: a shop that designs and builds custom lightsabers.

Yes, you read that correctly.

The shop is called Random Sabers and was originally started by a group of friends that had ideas for their own custom lightsaber designs and wanted to make them for-real. They now offer over 400 different designs and also custom-build sabers based on designs sent in by customers. They also offer several different "levels," if you will, of sabers, ranging from relatively plain stunt hilts for $50 to intricately-detailed electronic sabers with LED or Electro-Luminescent blades costing upwards of $300. They even name the designs for you (if you haven't done so already). Realistically, the only limit to what these guys will make is your imagination: they can tailor a design to fit almost any budget. (Obviously, there's no way they can make an EL Saber for $50, the electronic components alone cost more than that). Plus, they offer a variety of different blade colors and styles as well as several different belt clips and display stands.

The only think that really stinks-and this has nothing to do with Random Sabers-is that I had created about 2 dozen different designs of my own a long time ago, but since they were saved in a PowerPoint on my old PC (which is now dead), they're gone forever! And I just received a large amount of money (well, not really; I finally cashed the checks I got for Christmas and Birthday). Actually, I may still have them, it depends on if I made the designs before I backed up my hard drive. I'll have to check, hang on...

*some time passes while Jedi_Raptor07 searches his bedroom for the correct CDs*

Hmm... The CD Drive on this computer is making weird noises. I'll hafta tell Dad...

*more time passes while Jedi_Raptor07 explores the contents of the first CD*

Wrong Disc, hang on a minute...

*Even more time passes as Jedi_Raptor07 switches CDs and checks the second one*

YES!!! THEY LIVE! Or at least some of 'em do. Let me see...

*Still more time passes yadda yadda Jedi_raptor yadda yadda sees if they're really there*

Okay, good news, most of my designs are intact. Now it's just a matter of deciding which one(s) I want to submit to Random Saber. Or else I can just ask 'em to remachine one of their old designs...

So this also solves the problem of where nerdjedi and I are gonna find lightsabers for our Star Wars/Doctor Who movie. YAY! Now we just need a location, a TARDIS, some costumes and, most importantly, a budget. Wait-didn't he just say he just got a lot of money? Yes, I did, but since this film is a joint project, i.e. the brainchild of two people, I shouldn't have to finance the whole thing. Unless, of course, nerdjedi and whoever he happens to bring on board agree to give me complete creative control over the film, which isn't going to happen in a million years.

But regardless of whether or not the SW/Dr. Who project gets off the ground (sadly but realistically, it probably won't) I'll most likely order one regardless, be it one of Random Saber's previous models or one of my own designs.

I know, you're asking yourself why I'd ever consider dropping $100 or so on a fake lightsaber. It's a lightsaber. I'm a Star Wars fanatic. Do I need another reason. Plus, by buying a lightsaber instead of an airsoft rifle (by "instead," I mean "before"), my parent's can't argue that I have nowhere to use it and I might accidentally shoot the kids next door. I mean really, how can you shoot someone with a lightsaber?

If you have even a modicum of interest in Star Wars or have a taste for art, particuarly sculpture, I encourage you to check out Random Saber's Saber Gallery. 400+ original saber designs. 'Nuff said.

So, if you'll excuse me, I have a lightsaber that needs designing. Later!

Monday, March 5, 2007

Random Ramble

Okay, first off, I'd like to say "Great Job" to all of those involved with Sweeny Todd. I was going to have a short speech about what a wonderful job everyone did and how excellent the production was, but words fail me at the moment. Sorry.


Yeah, no Chapter 3 yet. It's 1/2 to 2/3 done, I just can't seem to get in "the zone" and have non-stop creative brainstorms, which is usually how I write. Okay, actually, I've been letting myself get distracted very easily, so it's all my fault.

Speaking of Codename: White Knight, I can seriously see it becoming a major motion picture. I've got a few ideas for actors for some of the roles, but I won't post those until I get at least another chapter or two (or three) up, so that's probably gonna be a while. But based on More Than a Job, who do you think would make a better David Pierce, Matt Damon or Mark Wahlberg?

I love my Wii. The Legend of Zelda: Twilignt Princess ROX!!!!! It's gonna take me a loooooooonng time to beat it. I've been playing for 15 hours and I'm not even 1/3 of the way done (Perspective: it took me 20 hours to beat Wind Waker). I still need more games, though. (stupid college sent my Need for Speed game back to Best Buy instead of forwarding it to me) There's a game based on The Godfather coming out soon, I think I might get it. But it would probably fall into the Do-Not-Play-If-Parents-Are-Home category, right next to Red Steel.

Getting back to movies, I think it's high-time Hollywood made another Robin Hood movie. The last serious film was the one starring Kevin Costner from 1991. (Yes, I realize that Men in Tights was made two years later, but please note the use of the word "serious" in the previous sentence.) And no matter how you look at it, Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves was by no means an epic film, unlike The Adventures of Robin Hood, the classic film starring Errol Flynn. A good Robin Hood movie must be an epic, and I think it's about time for Hollywood to make one. Personally, I think Ewan McGreggor would make a great Robin Hood.

I was going to type something here, but the phone rang (stupid telemarketers) and now I forgot what I was going to write. Darn it!

Yeah, that stupid telemarketer made me loose focus, so I can't think of anything else to write. Check back later; I may add more to the post.

Saturday, March 3, 2007

What Happens When I Get Bored

I shall now attempt to write a conversation using only the American Film Institute's Top 100 Movie Quotes. Wish me luck.


"Here's Johnny!"

"Stella! Hey, Stella!"

"Hello, gorgeous."

"Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me. Aren't you? You had me at 'hello.' "

"Snap out of it!"

"My precious."

"Surely you can't be serious."
"Of course I'm serious ... and don't call me Shirley."

"You don't understand! I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I could've been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am."

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn."

"Here's looking at you, kid."

"You talking to me?"

"What we've got here is failure to communicate."

"Hasta la vista, baby."

"Say 'hello' to my little friend!"

"Go ahead, make my day."

"You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya, punk?"

"Get your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape."

"Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer."

"I want to be alone. I'll be back."

"Shane. Shane. Come back!" I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too!"


Yeah... that's what happens. Sorry.

Friday, March 2, 2007


Whoever said that a sequel can never be as good as the original...

...hasn't seen this yet. After this, they have to make RvD3!

Lucas should've hired these guys to choreograph Episodes II and III. Ray Park (Darth Maul) choreographed Ep. I, which is (I think) on a similar level with RvD2.

What I'd really like to see is Ryan Wieber and Michael Scott make/work on a fanfilm that actually has a decent story. Why? Because the few that do have decent stories (see here) have absolutely horrid lightsaber choreography. And the films that do have good fight choreography are usually just lightsaber duels with little to no (usually the latter) plot whatsoever. I for one would like to see the best of both: a Star Wars FanFilm with a good story and good choreography. But that's probably never going to happen. Actually, it did, sort of. Check out The Formula. Only, that's not a fanfilm so much as it is a film about making a fanfilm, so it doesn't really count. BTW, if you do watch The Formula, make sure you view the Enriched version.

Speaking of which, I finally finished writing the screenplay for my fanfilm. Actually, I should say that nerdjedi and I finished writing the screenplay for our fanfilm. See, I knew that there's no way in H-E-Double-Hockey-Sticks that I could write, film, direct, edit, and otherwise produce a film of any kind, much less a Star Wars FanFilm, and unfortunately for me, all of my friends are away at college. And even if they weren't, our first-and hopefully only-attempt at making a movie was a complete disaster *shudders at the memories*, so I'd have to fine somewhere else to turn anyways. (Guys, if you're reading this, I'm sorry, but it is true.) So that left nerdjedi. After some convincing persuasion, he agreed to help me, but only on the condition that the film involve Doctor Who. Since no amount of persuading, coercing, arguing, begging, pleading, or groveling (yes, I was that desperate) would make him change his mind, I had no choice but to go along with it.

So, after several painstaking delays (the vast majority caused by Sweeny Todd), the first draft of what is-to my knowledge-the first and only Star Wars/Doctor Who crossover screenplay ever. It still needs a bit of cleaning up, but now that Sweeny's winding down that shouldn't take to long. And hopefully it can be filmed by the time I head back to school in August/September/Whenever.

Also, I should probably throw this out there (because if I don't he'll hunt me down and torment me), but nerdjedi actually did most of the work on the screenplay. It's five pages long, I wrote about the first page and a half, and with the exception of some dialogue and stage directions, nerdjedi wrote the rest. So many thanks and kudos to him for his hard work in bringing the screenplay to completion.